Mimi, Us and “C”

I was going to password protect this post but nah.  If one or two can pick up something from this entry, I’ll be truly happy.

Remember my entry, Prayers for Mommy, where  I asked that you whisper a short prayer for my Mom who was then undergoing a series of tests at the Medical City?  In another entry about another one of our packed weekends, I managed to slip this line in: “It was just before we left the restaurant when we received the biggest best news ever, and that is that my Mom’s well and healthy and will live to be a hundred years old…maybe more!”

The truth is, the news we received wasn’t exactly “the biggest best news ever“.  On the contrary, It was one of the worst I ever received in my lifetime.  You see, my Mom was diagnosed with breast cancer.  And it was during that dinner with my visiting cousin that the news was broken to us.  The line that ended up on my blog, the one I quoted above, was the news I would have preferred we had received.  Let’s just say it was my way of manipulating working with the Law of Attraction.   And besides, my Mom didn’t want to spread the news just yet.  We wanted to avoid having people think about the worst, and talking about her being sick.  The last thing we wanted was attracting more sickness and negativity.  I understand if this sounds a little too weird for you.

I was devastated, to say the least.  This is the sort of thing that happens to other people, not to my loved ones, least of all my very own mother.  It was that kind of a moment for me.  It didn’t help too that I was thousands of miles away.  The funny thing is, it was my Mom who needed the least comforting.  She took the news well because deep in her heart she knew she IS well and that everything will be ok.  She was worried more about me than about herself.  I drew so much comfort from talking with my Mom during those first few days (even upto now!) and hearing her say that I shouldn’t worry about her because she is ok and well. 

If my Mom were anybody else, she would have probably withdrawn from the world, gave up, got depressed and got worse faster than anyone can say chemo.  It’s amazing how she received the diagnosis with grace and remained strong and courageous for herself and for everyone else.  This doesn’t surprise me at all because all throughout her life, my Mom has made good of the stinky cards that life too often dealt her.  Too often, if I may say so myself.  But with faith as steadfast as hers, my Mom knows as do all of us, that God will come through for us with another one of His miracles like He always does.  In fact, everyday, God gives us one little miracle to hold on to.  Case in point, only one breast is affected and has thankfully not spread.  Also, all the results of my Mom’s recent medical tests have been very favorable. 

While cancer has mostly negative undertones than it has positive, I can enumerate a host of good that has come out of it.  Since my Mom’s diagnosis in December, all of her friends now know that she has the dreaded “C”.  And the shower of prayers, love and support she receives everyday is just overwhelming.   It is true what they say, you know, that it is during trying times that we realize who our true friends are.  And I’m glad my Mom has plenty.  Our bond as a family has become stronger and tighter than ever and our faith, greater.  We now try to observe a healthier lifestyle, which is primarily why I no longer eat beef and pork (unless left without a choice…which is fairly rarely). 

I, for one, have become the poster girl for positive thinking.  Now you understand why I choose to look at things in a positive light.  I have become more aware of blessings that we receive everyday and have made it a practice to literally count them.  I no longer rant about the most trivial of things, except maybe Abby’s precociousness.   And while I have no intention of imposing these things upon you, I would suggest you give them a try.  Think of it this way, the more you think of what went wrong during the day, the more you’re turning yourself into a magnet who might just attract more things going the way you don’t want them to.   So the next time the pair of shoes you want to buy isn’t available in your size or when you’re stuck in traffic or when you didn’t get what you thought you wanted, just take a deep breath and be thankful for what you already have…like perfect health.   There’s just too much going on in this world to be ranting about the littlest things.  But hey, that’s just me. 

I admit it’s tough to remain positive in the face of something so negative.  I’ve had plenty of Sisa moments, when I cry then I stop then I try to think happy thoughts only to end up crying again.  I do allow myself to have a good cry.  But I don’t let it drag on ’til kingdom come.   Prayer is my best ally during these moments.  And after a good chat with God, I am fine once again.

As I heave a sigh of relief for finally being able to tell you about this, er, little thing, a prayer of thanksgiving for my Mom’s upcoming 100% wellness will be a great treasure I shall cherish forever.  I thank you in advance from the bottom of my heart and on my Mom’s behalf.

Tomorrow, I’ll tell you about our fun weekend.  Promise.  But if you can’t wait, you can take a peek here and here.

God bless you all and have a great week!

PS:  To my friends from whom I’ve kept this all this time, thank you for your understanding.   Love you all.  Mmmmwah!